Click. I checked the LCD monitor of my camera.  Too far.  I took a couple of steps closer to the butterfly that’s nesting quietly on a yellow flower.  It’s a beautiful Saturday.  I woke up this morning, quickly gathered my keys, an extra shirt, camera, chips and drinks and put it inside my backpack, jumped in the car and headed to Tagaytay.  I really enjoy long drives by the countryside –with music blasting on the stereo.  It took me almost 2 hours to get to Tagaytay, because I was taking in the view and would make random stops when I see something I want to photograph.  Yagatyat [yes, that’s how you read Tagaytay in my dictionary] is my short escape from the chaos of Manila –and the chaos in my mind.  I stuck my face outside the window… took a deep breath and enjoyed the fresh air and sun on my face.  The sun stole a kiss from me, but I was too busy enjoying the greens and blues to notice.  I’ll never tire of the colors of nature.   

Earlier this month, a friend went to Shanghai and left her dog with me.  I’ve always loved dogs but never owned one so I had no idea how to take care of one.  My mom’s allergic to dogs.  When my friend asked if I can watch over her dog, I actually declined.  Not because it wasn’t the breed that I prefer.  But one whole month? The dog seemed smart enough to take care of itself.  It gave me a weird look.  I don’t think he liked the scenario either.  I stared back at him.  What makes you think I’d enjoy waking up to a doggy poop- smelling condo?  He snorted and walked away.   I don’t know how my friend got me to saying yes, but all of a sudden, I was pouring dog food from the pack to a steel canister and labeling it Foop.  Yes, there were times I forgot to feed the dog.  Heck, I have dinnerless nights too.  Besides, I’m giving the dog survival mode 101 lessons.  I’ve been partying out a lot.  I was getting burnt out but I kept at it, wasting my health away.  I was burning Benjamins from too many drinks and squandering my good mind and body condition from lack of sleep.

Deep inside, I was longing for a nice, quiet time sitting on a couch, with carpet feel on the soles of my feet, watching DVD or TV… or a silly or meaningful conversation over a quiet dinner.  Good food, good times, good company.  Something to make every minute count… to make waking up, eating, bathing, going to work, getting stressed at work, coming home from work… make it all worthwhile.   

I came home one night drunk.  A small amount of light sneaked into the crack of the door when I opened it and the light rested on a furry mass lying on the floor.  It was Foop.  Uh-oh, I forgot to feed him the whole day.  Tsk-tsk, I should check up on him more often.  I quietly tiptoed my way to the bed, careful not to wake him up.  I lied down.  Ugh, my back hurts.  I suddenly felt warm breathing at the back of my hand.  I saw Foop hovering near my right arm, looking at me.  He smelled me and I felt his disapproval.  I probably reeked of puke, smoke and sweat.  After a whiff, I was expecting him to turn around and walk away… but he rested his head on my arm and I felt the warmth of his company.  No matter how unguarded [drunk is the better word] I was, his presence made me feel safe.  I had no worries waking up tomorrow alone.  I smiled and patted his fluffy head.  I slowly drifted to sleep… I woke up the next day and saw Foop giving me a dumb smile.  I wondered which one of us had the worse morning breath.  I smiled back.  The sun looked brighter than yesterday.  I got used to the pitter patter of his small paws around the condo.  I didn’t care if he messed up one corner or left dirty marks on my bathroom floor.  I saw myself declining one offer after the other to party out.  I looked forward to going to the groceries to buy dog food, or go to Tiendesitas to check out the cutest collar for him, or just walked around the mall or streets with Foop.  I can spend the whole day with Foop without noticing that an army passed by. 

The more time I spent with Foop, the more that I long to be with him.  I started loving the way a smile is lurking at the corners of his mouth, or the way he sleeps, or how inquisitive he gets sometimes that makes me wonder if he is a dog coz he has the curiosity of a cat, or how musty the way his wet feet smell, or how he hates baths like any other dog, or how we both enjoy good food.  He brings a smile in my heart –the one that lasts long after I’m already at work… or when I think of him. Now, I understand why some pet owners go gaga over their pets or why they lavishly smother them with love, kisses, and luxury.  Pets bring you an insurmountable amount of joy.  One that cannot be replaced by a totally wild night with the girls, or a bouquet of the sweetest smelling flowers, or a dinner date at the classiest restaurant in town, or getting the most expensive gadget I’ve been meaning to buy, or undivided attention from the cutest guy in the crowd…  It’s the joy that makes you feel light-hearted… makes you sing to the tunes of life… and dance like you own the world.  It’s happiness that’s unspeakable.  You can’t begin to describe it.  You can only feel it. I guess Foop filled that part of me I missed… having to love someone/something without boundaries/conditions.  Having to share my day with someone who makes that actual difference to your day…  Living is different when you’re taking care of someone.  It gives meaning to living. 

Ring ring. 

My friend told me her flight back to Manila is scheduled next week.  I took a deep breath.  I almost forgot about my friend. Now, I found myself in Tagaytay taking pictures.  I left Foop at home.   

I shouldnt be spending too much time with Foop.  Sigh, I hate that dog.  He pees and he barks… and… Sigh, I really hate that dog.

“It’s so damn hard to even just think about giving up something I’m getting quite attached to.”  Nowadays, I look forward to the 25^th hour.  The days are getting shorter as the week comes to an end.

Boarding Flight No. 2P 774 B via Air Philippines… Flight destination: Manila with stopover at Cebu.

Cushee locating seat 3-C… ugh, it’s the aisle seat [First time I'm sitting on the aisle side.] I started reading the Luxe Magazine provided in the plane. 10 minutes into the flight… Zzzz… I woke up an hour later in Cebu with food and drink on the table. [I shrugged, no intention of eating.] Some passengers got off while new passengers got in. The steward announced that it is still restricted to use mobile phones while refueling. The pilots stepped inside the plane again, stopped by the entrance looking at something and started an exchange. They went inside their little hole. We were about to take off again… 1:30 pm –1 hour and I’m back in Manila. I can just imagine the backlog of work I have to do since while in Davao, I’ve been bombarded with calls from Game Mag, Hinge, Sonigold, Dondi and e-games… and some from my bosses. I started eating the chips -ugh. I should learn how to cope with stress without munching something.

1:45 pm. I was deciding whether to lick the crumbs on my fingers or wipe them when one of the stewards approached me.

Steward: Excuse me Ma’am. The captain is inviting you if you would like to join them in the flight deck.
Cushee: [with a stupid face] Huh?
Steward: Ma’am, the captain is wondering if you’re interested to see the flight deck.
Cushee: [with another stupid face. I didn't get it at that time. I thought I did something wrong. I thought I was being reprimanded because I was listening to my iPod aboard the plane] Uhm, why?
Steward: What’s your name Ma’am?
Cushee: Jane.
Steward: Ma’am, the captain is asking if you can join their company in the flight deck.
Cushee: Inside the cabin?
Steward: Flight deck, Ma’am. [Another day of higher learning à Pilot room equals flight deck.]
Cushee: [Hesitating] Oh. Uhm…… sure.
Steward: That’s great. I will inform the captain. [He started to leave.]
Cushee: Uhm wait, is that allowed?
Steward: Yes, ma’am.

When the steward left, I was still bewildered. After 1 minute, I saw him hovering nearby again. I realized I still have crumbs on my fingers waiting to be licked off… no more debates, I immediately wiped my fingers on the napkin. Where’s an alcohol or hand sanitizer when you needed one? Argh. He approached me again and asked if I was ready. I said yes even if I haven’t checked if I had drool from sleeping early on or I had food crumbs on my face. My hair was a mess, that’s one thing for sure. I got up and followed the steward. He opened the door. I stepped in. The flight deck is only about 5 x 5 feet. It was so cramped inside. An old car’s interior is roomier. All three fellows greeted me. They asked my name and they introduced themselves. I only caught the name of the third fellow -Edwin. First question - Am I from General Santos? Small talk. What did I do there, Am I traveling alone, Is it my first time to fly Air Phil… The third pilot pointed at some buttons and told me their functions. While the captain, 1st pilot, asked me personal questions like my age and my work -where I hang out… and then finally he asked for my number. Their age group..? The captain -37 y/o. The co-pilot -27 y/o.
The third guy -38 y/o.

I sarcastically remarked, “So you guys are in the married-age group? Edwin replied, “Actually, we’re single.” Edwin then went on to say that I don’t look my age. He thought I was still studying and couldn’t have been more than 20. The captain had a good sense of humor. He kept cracking jokes and was very comfortable talking. He had this smooth attitude about him. I don’t think I’ve ever shared a long conversation with anyone in uniform. It was weird coz the windshield was covered with something like a car windshield sun protector. I asked how they can view with that set-up and the captain pointed at a screen. The radar screen is like a navigational device. It showed the plane’s position and if there were any planes within a certain mile-radius. Cool stuff!!! The captain asked if I wanted to stay until the descent. How can I refuse an offer like that? I don’t think the opportunity comes so often. The third pilot propped the extra chair and fastened my seatbelt. He pointed at Marikina, Pasig… and at the meter that says we were 2500 feet from the ground. The captain was busy talking to the radio and exchanging commands with the co-pilot. Edwin pointed in another area and told me it was Makati. Sigh. I missed Makati. I missed my office. I missed my co-workers. I missed boxing. I missed my friends. I missed my family. Edwin said we were approaching the runway in 6 mins and 30 seconds. Cool how they can calculate the time and landing. After a few minutes, I saw the runway. It was one of the most amazing things… landing while in the flight deck. It was an experience for the books!

Wow, I’m finally back in Manila.   I have been so busy the past 2 months that I don’t even know where I left off.  It was a month-long preparation for the June 16 company event in Azzurro then the following week I was busy with the Survey project and other leftover stuff from the anniversary event.  June 23, I had dinner with JICA friends.  Oguri-san, a Japanese youth counterpart visited the Philippines. During that same weekend, Rose, our sashin girl from Cebu, arrived too for a convention in Manila.  Rose and Ninski followed after dinner and we decided to lounge at Oguri’s hotel. We all got together and reminisced our Japan days.  It was nonstop talking until way past midnight. I had so much energy that day. Why? We had a Man Comm meeting earlier that day.  Man Comm meeting is regularly scheduled every Friday at 11am for company updates and business plans.  I was tasked to formulate the itinerary for the company outing and the mechanics for the “Name that Café” contest that IPVG and Sabiclub will partake in. During the meeting, our CEO gave me a promotion!!! I was soooo elated!!!  After the meeting, the Sabiclub GM congratulated me and said that good things happen to good people.  How sweet of her to say that.  Things like this continue to inspire me to be my best and return the kindness that I get to other people.  Since that meeting, I’ve been so bubbly and talkative! 

The week after that I was busy coordinating with the regional sales manager of e-games for future café tournaments and a certain project manager of IPVG for the Korean survey project.  Our CEO knows I’ve been coordinating with two departments from the other company and he jokingly said that it comes with my new position. I also started preparing for event materials/designs for the opening of SM Baguio. I was taking my leisure time since I was informed that Station 168 GM will be the one who’ll take care of the bulk of things because he’s the one who’s already in Baguio. We won’t have the usual opening ceremonies.  We planned to go with a very simple opening –no catering, no fireworks.  That same week, I was preparing for my Davao trip while also planning for the company outing in Baguio.  We were supposed to leave for Baguio July 6 via a private coaster and head back to Manila, July 9. 

My Davao flight was scheduled June 30, so I filed for a 1-day vacation leave.  I was engaged with hurriedly finishing some projects before the trip when Thursday afternoon [June 29], our CEO dropped the bomb.  He wanted me to go to Baguio on Monday right after my Davao trip.  Say what again??  He explained that the vice-mayor of Baguio was expected to attend alongside the President of another company, so I had to do the whole hula-bura of an opening event. Imagine, from my supposed vacation, I have to travel to Baguio and stay there for one week to plan and execute a Grand Opening event. I was going crazy Thursday afternoon. My Puerto Galera plan with JICA friends was already moved due to company outing, which I can’t complain for since I’ve been proposing for a company outing for the longest time… and I was excited to bond with my officemates. BUT due to the change of plans, I had to go to Baguio ahead of the pack.  I am EAGER to help out my S168 GM because I know he has a lot on his hands already and I’m sure he won’t be able to take care of the event plans, but I was really forlorn to go to Baguio by Monday since my friend from Gen San will be spending the week in Manila. I had two options –either I take a bus or plane to Baguio.  I hesitated on traveling by public bus since I’d be going alone and I’ve never traveled that far on my own, especially not on a bus. So I was thinking of taking the plane. My GM asked me if I had taken an Asian Spirit flight and I said not yet.  He then told me about his horrendous experience going to Baguio via plane. He said it’s safe but the flight was shaky. I also got to talk to our CEO and he joked about giving me his tickets because he doesn’t want to fly there anymore. After a long thought, I decided to just travel by land.  I was already thinking of inviting some friends to drive me there. However, I talked to my GM again and he said he wants me to fly to Baguio so I won’t be tired when I arrive. He then calmed my fears by saying that he hasn’t heard of any plane crash in Baguio and kept on joking about the safety of the flight. He insisted that I take the plane and that the flight will be over before it even started. Finally, I agreed to fly to Baguio with an anxious heart. Our accountant booked me a flight and the ticket was delivered to me. 

June 29- I had dinner with Rhoda, Ninski and Kennykins.  We ate until we were so full.  Rhoda and I drank Bailey’s while Ninski drank beer.  Rhoda and I bought pasalubong for the Mindanao peeps. We separated around 10pm and agreed to meet in the airport by 3am for our 430 flight to Davao.  I crashed at Theo Mayo’s place in Makati Ave. I was sooo sleepy since I had such a long day, not to mention a long month of work and no play… besides, I had to get up by 2am to get ready to be brought to the airport.  Sadly, my sweetie [yes, we call each other sweetie like we’re in a relationship, haha. My theo mayo.] was having a major dilemma that time.  I had to stay up with her and comfort her through the night.  She had been crying the whole day that her eyes were so puffed and I felt her tired body. I’ve been fighting my droopy eyes to stay awake and listen earnestly to my friend. I waited for her to fall asleep before going to bed.  I think I fell asleep around 12mn.  2 hours later, my alarm woke me up and I had to drag my heavy body to a cold shower.  30 minutes later, Rhoda and I boarded the plane at 4am.  We were so excited!!!  Rhoda was able to get some winks during the flight while I waited for the sunrise.  It was soooo beautiful –it was a masterpiece crafted perfectly.

We arrived in Davao airport which was so much better than the Manila domestic airport. We got our luggage and headed to the washroom.  We were the last ones out and RV had to call Rhoda to make sure we were on that flight since everyone left already –hahaha. Romy, RV and RV’s friend, Ramil met us at the airport. It was such a refreshing treat to see Romy and RV!!!  Nonstop conversation swiftly entailed as soon as we got in the van.       My Davao trip was one adventure after the next.  We also met Ton-ton and he treated us to a lunch buffet at a Davao restaurant and dinner at Colassa’s.  We ate breakfast in Tap’s, a popular tapsihan in Davao.  Then we went to the rest house of Congresswoman Darlene to get the boys’ bags.  We went to downtown and checked the local market.  I had my first taste of Durian!!! The lady vendor was kind enough to give me a sample.  The Durian flesh had a hard time going down my throat, but I managed a smile to the nice vendor lady who made me taste their suha as well.  Me and Rhods bought a lot of Durian candies and ube candies as pasalubong.  Friday night was spent bar-hopping in Davao. We went to KTV around 8pm and left after two hours of singing. They ordered a bottle of Tequila and I was assigned to be the “tanggero.”  We then moved to another nightspot which was a ballroom joint. Ramil was hesitant to go but I insisted on going with the persuasion of shouldering the expenses. Rhoda and I had a dance instructor and it was fun learning and relearning some ballroom moves.  I got to dance with the dance instructor, Ton-ton, Romy and RV.  Ton-ton danced a mean tango! Romy and I slow-danced to a love song, while RV and I danced swing. The DI and I danced Rumba, Boogie and Reggae. Rhoda had loads of fun dancing with the DI too.  Ton-ton had some more drinks while watching all the dancers on the floor. I gave the DI a tip which RV was against for.  I had no choice since he kept asking if me and Rhoda were there for a beauty pageant [wink wink] Seriously, I had to give a tip since that’s the way it should be. Ramil told me that while me and DI were dancing, the DI kept staring at me.  I didn’t notice though.  I thought he was gay. I actually had the balls to ask him –haha, since me and Rhoda were debating whether he was or not.  I casually asked during our last dance, “Is it true that most male DI/s are gay?” to which he vehemently replied, “hindi ah. Yung iba lang kasi. Karamihan siguro sa Manila ganun, pero dito sa amin, bawal. Bihira ganyan..”  I nodded my head.  Then he said, “hindi ako bakla ha…” I smiled and replied, “I didn’t say you were one.”  We went to Halo afterwards. 

Davao has its own Halo, but I’m sure it’s not under the same franchised card from the Halo in Makati. Halo was a small hip-hop bar in Davao.  This is where it got a little wilder –but not the same riot like in Makati bars.  Since it was my idea to go to different bars, I covered the expenses again which was at a minimum compared to how Makati charges.  I really enjoyed the music in Halo.  Rhoda and I danced our hearts out.  We didn’t have a care in the world since we didn’t know anyone there. This young guy approached us and introduced himself while he danced with us.  He said something to me that I didn’t get, so I just ignored him. I went to the bar where Ramil and RV are seated. I saw Ton-ton talking to the guy.  When I got back to Ton-ton, Rhoda and Romy’s group, this Davaueno told me, “hindi ka pala marunong mag-bisaya”  So that’s why I couldn’t figure out what he was saying under all the blaring noise. Rhoda and I danced the night away.  This girlfriend of mine from the Japan trip is 6 years older than me but she kept up with me and danced like she was my age. The only other person who can survive my all-night dancing spree is my soul-sister kingwee, but Rhoda had almost taken that spot [And perhaps she did, coz we haven’t danced in a long time kingtot! Let’s hook up sis soon]    We kept on dancing and dancing.  Everyone has started to get tired but me and Rhoda endured no breaks at all. We totally enjoyed the sounds and we kept on screaming.  Every time a familiar tune was being spinned by the DJ, we kept on screaming and laughing and having a grand time.  Ramil, RV and Romy on the other hand got distracted once in a while by the girls who were dancing on the ledge. One girl even danced on the bar.  The boys told me that one girl took off her shirt so she was dancing only with bra on.  And I thought, people were more conservative in provinces.  I guess I thought wrong. There’s a funny story about the girls dancing on the ledge and Romy-san that I’ll share with our JICA comrades. Oh well… lunch is in the next hour. I have to cut this abruptly. I have to get back to work before my lunch date with Chaifer! I missed you chaiferoo!!!  Oh by the by, I had lunch 2 weeks ago with former President Aquino, her sweet daughter, Tita Balsy because the Benigno family brought me along.  We went to Tarlac so the Aquino family can show us the Aquino Center, which is a huge Museum dedicated to Ninoy Aquino. It’s not everyday you get invited by the former President of the PI to have lunch so I decided to forego resting and other activities to do and join the group.  I also met Noynoy at the Aquino center and he was our tour guide for most parts.  It was on that same day that former President Aquino was interviewed for Philippine Tatler.  Before going to Tarlac, we had caviar and cream cheese spread over toasted Crostini that the former president prepared. It was utterly scrumptious. I’m gonna try the same recipe.     Will continue tattling the mis-adventures! More stories from Baguio. “Manila, Manila… I’m finally home.” 

Album: http://cushee.multiply.com/photos/album/118/Davao_Trip-_Rhodas_Lens

Album: http://cushee.multiply.com/photos/album/115/A_Day_with_the_President

Album: http://cushee.multiply.com/photos/album/113/23_June_2006-_Oguri-san_Visits_Philippines

Album: http://cushee.multiply.com/photos/album/121/16_June_2006-_Station_168_5th_Anniversary_Event 

It’s another new week!!!  I am so elated! Finally, the BIG NIGHT event is ovah.  I have a few pending projects that still need to be tackled ASAP but at least I can put this event behind me now. It’s been a long and stressful month or so of event planning and preparation.  I was mentally and physically tired especially the past 2 weeks –overworked and overwork-out.  Wednesday, my boxing trainer was looking at me funny because I didn’t throw any solid punches.  I didn’t even have the strength to lift weights. Too bad I wasn’t able to work out the past three days though.

Not that organizing an event is not fun but when you’re basically a one-man team, it sometimes takes its toll on you.  Besides tons of pressure on your shoulder to make the event a blast, coordinating with dozens of people can be quite exhausting. That’s the downside, and a gazillion of other things.  But why concentrate on that, when there are also quite a few perks to relish.  One is the food-tasting portion.  I got to be invited by certain restaurants to sample their dishes.  I simply love eating –especially when it’s free.  Since I was on a diet, I had to restrain myself from eating plenty.  But oh my YUM, all the food I tasted were delish! You get to extend your network of friends and business contacts.  Sometimes, I try to be all business when dealing with biz contacts but you meet some who are nice and fancy befriending you.  For instance, a 24-er from one of the game distributors invited me for lunch and despite my protest, she paid for it.  Just last week, I met this person who kinda had a fam-financial situation similar to mine and we shared a good conversation. Last week, I’ve been feeling a little depressed –thinking about life, my path and purpose [yuck, would you like bread to go with that cheese?]  You ever have those moments when you want to have a feeling of fulfillment?  I’ve had my share of achievements but the sense of fulfillment I’m referring to is something that stays with you for the rest of your life even if you’re stripped of everything you achieved or physically owned.  I guess having a child is a fulfillment, no doubts about that.  Having a child is like having an extension of you.  How about marriage?  Is marriage a fulfillment?  Some people separate these two.  Some think that as long as you’re a good father or a good provider, dissolution of marriage is not such a big deal and sometimes it seems to be the “best” thing for the family.  However, my POV is, it shouldn’t be considered as a suitable option.  It shouldn’t even be an option at all. One worthy point I heard this weekend –that “a solid and good marriage” is the greatest gift you could ever give your kid.  Friday night:

I’d rate myself only an 80% in execution of the event.  I’m my worst critic but there are a lot of areas I could have done better.  A lot of guests commented on how good the food was.  Ayan, the event host, was the highlight of the party.  He jelled all my plans together.  I felt vindicated when Ayan asked how many prepped the whole event (Ayan is part of FabTrix Promotions and has been into events organizing for a few years already so he knows how hectic and crazy it can get).  I told Ayan I was the only one who organized the whole thing.  The respect and little approbation I got from him made me feel better.  He asked how long I prepped for this thing and it kinda startled him that it only took less than a month.  The guests participated in the corporate games and I kept on hearing people roar in laughter –which is a good indication that they enjoyed the party.  I wished there were more dancing though but the party packed up early –to my advantage too since I was yearning for a break/rest.  The crew was commendable.  I wish I was able to designate someone to take the pictures from the get go.  I only remembered to ask someone halfway through the program.  Special thanks to khel for assisting me throughout the event.  He was literally beside me readily offering assistance.  One of my biggest problems that night that I was so agitated about was seating capacity.  During a meeting, our CEO, General Manager and me finalized that it would be 100 pax, but 6 days prior to the event, the CEO told me to adjust it to 130-150.  I have signed the contract and settled the arrangements 3 weeks prior to the event and all of a sudden he changed his mind like everything was doable.  In the contract, it is stipulated that changes to event details should be made 2 weeks prior, so how does he expect me to add 30-50 more people?  There were a lot of other concerns that kept my mind all boggled down.  Since Wednesday night, I’ve been high-strung and people had a hard time talking to me coz I’m always spaced out with so many things going through my mind.  Thursday night, I felt a vein throbbed in my head (seriously).  Good thing, it all sorted out during the event itself. Saturday night: I attended a family dinner at Emerald Garden in lieu of Father’s Day. 

Although it’s the second Father’s Day that Tito Ted wasn’t around, I got sentimental this weekend.  I missed Tito Ted terribly that my heart literally ached as much as it did last year.  He was like a second father to me.  Although I used to get tense whenever he was around, I valued every moment I spent with him.  I’ve always enjoyed listening to his stories and political views.  I wish he can see his son now and how much he has progressed and has slowly realized his dreams. Back to the dinner -my lolo, dad’s side, was there.  As usual, there wasn’t much said during dinner except under-the-table teasing with Joyce.  I totally regret not enjoying my Chinese-conversation classes back in HS.  I would have started a conversation with my grand-daddy-o during the few times we meet for dinner.  During dinner, I felt really tired.  I couldn’t figure out if it was my body or mind that was worn out but I reckoned that a massage would ease both.  I suddenly asked my dad (it took a lot of guts to ask him directly since I rarely ask him for anything) if he still had massage certificates from Clark and Hatch.  I remember he gave me a couple of MCs a year ago.  I expected him to say none since it’s been a year when he reached for his wallet and took out one.  How fresh is that! I am such a lucky bee (Thank goodness, I don’t have to spend for a massage.  I’m saving up for a few trips in the coming weeks. I promised God I would haul my b*tt to church Sunday as a sign of gratitude).   After dinner, my dad dropped us off Manila Hotel to have a few drinks while enjoying the music of Music Unlimited combo.  I was deciding on whether I would get a liqueur or not (I was tempted so badly to get Bailey’s but I remembered my “detoxify” program) when I drifted to sleep.  I was asleep for almost two hours –aftermath of Friday’s event I guess.  When I woke up, I saw my dad and mom slow-dancing.  Sigh, what a beautiful sight to wake up to. I was watching them still a little dazed from sleep and I couldn’t help but feel sentimental again. It was so romantic –I guess one of the most romantic moments I’ve had (although I wasn’t really a part of it) in quite a while.  It made me want to dance too. The music shifted to swing/boogie sounds and everyone was suddenly on the floor.  Gosh, I missed ballroom dancing.  My parents used to take me to one back in HS.  I remembered Japan too coz a very special friend surprised me when he led me to dance.  Can this weekend get any more nostalgic for me???  My dad doesn’t dance that well (he’s a cum laude in UP, one of the very few smart people that has impressed me.  If he danced well, I’d say he’s a favored child of SOMEONE up there) but my heart was delighted to see my dad danced his heart out that night.  I can’t figure out if Saturday night was a celebration of Dad’s day or Janey’s day because aside from the massage certificate, I also got a Gucci wallet from my dad when we got home.  And I didn’t buy him any Father’s Day gift this year (since I was too busy to shop!)  It couldn’t have come at a better time coz I considered replacing my wallet of 7 years (hahahaha, how pathetic.) last week.  There’s an outside force conspired to help me not spend a single dime (which is helping my “detoxify” plan immensely!) 

Hot off the grill –I just learned a few seconds ago that I’m going to Baguio on the 7^th of July!  Yay! BV, my ops manager actually requested me 2 weeks ago to go on the 30^th (June) since it was supposed to be the Opening target date for our Baguio branch.  He called me up to ask me if I can go. There was dead air for a few seconds until finally he told me he was kidding.  He asked if I had anything planned and I said yes, I already booked a flight to Davao on that day.  It’s work but I really wanted to go to Baguio.  I think it has been a decade since I last went there.  But I knew I could not compromise this trip that me and my good friend Rhoda were set to take.  We booked the flight two months ago!  Anyway, Jonard just informed me that we’re going to Baguio!!! Uh-oh… I was planning an out-of-town trip with JICA friends on the 8^th.  Tsk-tsk.  I have to work out something here. Sunday- I wasn’t able to go to mass even after I promised to make an effort to. I know I’ll get punished soon. I was supposed to go to mass after swimming with family but my mom changed her mind. 

I enjoyed my one and only Ace Water Spa experience last month.  It’s a huge water spa complex near Araneta Ave, QC where there are 16 therapeutic water showers that massage your neck, back and feet.  They also have herbal pools.  I’m really looking forward to going back. Besides, swimming burns a lot of calories.  I love Sundays.  It is the day I dedicate totally to myself.  I usually spend my Sundays locked up in my room.  I lounge in my room, lay on the crisp white linen of my bed, watch tv, rearrange my clothes in the closet, trying to mix and match a new number/outfit from my wardrobe, fantasize, think about my life, think about the people I cherish, play dress-up or have a mini-fashion show, rap, draw, paint and dance to my heart’s content.  For some weird reason, I enjoy cleaning my room or arranging papers, CDs, clothes neatly.  It’s very therapeutic.  It sometimes turns out to be a scavenger hunt coz you find items you haven’t used in years.  

Monday- I went to work with such a cheery mood!  I got to work around 640am.  On the way to work, Narda played on the radio and I was daydreaming of an out-of-town trip.  I love long drives to the countryside.  As I was singing to Narda and quietly thanking my mom that she wasn’t driving like a madman this morning, I realized how happy I am.  I mean, I am blessed by God with struggles that make me a stronger but not a hateful person. He blessed me with struggles to truly appreciate the moments I am happy.  He blessed me with struggles for me to know that I can lean on my family and friends.  He blessed me with struggles to teach me how to be content with the little I have. I am so blessed.  Content contributes greatly to my happiness.  I may not have everything I desire.  Events may not go according to plan.  I am yet to discover which path I am going to take (I’ve been kicking myself on the head since the start of the year coz I planned to get my own place this year. However, my plans got blocked by a couple of things. But I realized I shouldn’t berate myself.  Some plans are better off delayed).  I am enjoying the ride.  By next year, I hope to get a place of my own and work on something I’ve been meaning to do. I can’t believe I’ve written this much already.  I have to stop or else this will become a tell-all book (haha).  By the by, I can’t wait for Prince Charles’ secretary’s book to come out.  It must contain a lot of juicy stuff. 

Shout outs 

Acey: Thank you for your text message after the party. I know you aren’t that emotionally expressive but I really appreciate the message! I kept laughing after reading the last part though, “pahinga ka na para di ka na desserts!” hahaha.  mwah! 

Kennykins and Gina Lizertiguez: See you amigas soon. Au re·voir! 

Album: http://cushee.multiply.com/photos/album/121/16_June_2006-_Station_168_5th_Anniversary_Event 

In romantic movies, situations predictably unfold by: girl meets boy, sparks fly, small conflicts arise, and onto the happily-ever-after.

I really enjoyed watching The Break-up.  I have to say it’s the best romantic comedy of the 1st half of the year.  The script was well written –maybe the best script of the year for romantic comedies.

I especially liked the part where Aniston and Vince were arguing over the dishes and lemons.

Aniston: I busted my a** the whole day cooking dinner and you could have shown appreciation by just saying “Thank you honey, I’ll help you with the dishes.”

Vince: [throws the controller] Fine. I’ll help you with the dishes.

Aniston: You know what… never mind. I’ll do the dishes.

Vince: You just said you want me to help with the dishes.

Aniston: I want you to WANT to do the dishes.

Vince: Why should I have a strong desire to do the dishes?

This was a super funny scene.

It portrayed well the scenario when boy and girl are exhausted after another long day. …where the routine starts to drive them absolutely nuts… when all the little things that used to endear them to each other suddenly start to annoy each other. “…2 tickets please for The Break-up.” It was an amusing voyage into the unraveling and deconstruction of a once solid and loving relationship. The rumored off-screen couple [VV and JA] star in ‘The Break-Up,’ which starts where most romantic comedies end: after boy and girl have met, fallen in love, moved in to start their happily-ever-after… they realize the happily-ever-after is something to work for. I have reached that stage where you wind up driving each other crazy. Thank God we are way over that. Pushed to the breaking-up point after their latest “why can’t you do this one little thing for me?” argument, Aniston begins to realize that what she may be really fighting for isn’t so much the place but the person. This is Aniston’s best role yet and her delivery of the lines has improved to another level in this film.

The film was able to capture the anguish and distress that girls go through because some guys don’t grow up- they only grow old. He even said, “If I had my eyes closed, I could have sworn you were the one talking.” True enough, I have already lipped most of the lines that were said years ago.

The turning point, an hour and 30mins into the movie, was when Vince Vaughn surprised Aniston with a dinner that he carefully prepared. He apologized for all the times he took her for granted and said that he realized that he needed to change… and he needed to work on a lot of things. He said tearfully how much he loves Jen. She was taking in everything that Vince was saying… finally, the recognition of her efforts, presence and love… It took a while for Jen to reply… with tears in her eyes.

“I just don’t feel the same way anymore.”

Ka-boom. [08/01/06: I was talking to Carlo G this morning. That last line reminded him of our conversation last week. He teasingly said, "there's legally blonde, now the break-up... your life is a movie." I quipped, "But I'm always in the conflict part of a movie..."]

Sigh.

Do we really have to be at the brink of losing someone to realize the importance of that person in our lives? Some people are not lucky enough to meet that one person who can make them feel truly alive. Sometimes we never get to bump into that person that matches our life line –who can make you smile amidst all the trouble, who can make you feel your best and inspire you to be your best, that person you won’t ever let go and you would fight for, heaven and hell, who can laugh with you all day and no matter where you go, you manage to always have fun and create lifetime of memories forged only by a special bond… only a few lucky ones do. And it changes them forever

Project Detox update:

1.      Work-                I am so stressed with the upcoming event this June.  I’ve been quite busy the last two weeks with other marketing/presentation stuff that I haven’t welcomed the stress of preparing for this event yet… and I have only two weeks to go!!!

2.      Diet-                Well, I’ve been trying my best to follow a strict diet but I haven’t really followed it yet to the letter. But so far, I’ve been eating less and less.  I’ve only been eating about two meals a day since two days ago (but meals fit for a king -haha, kidding!!).  I’ve also reduced my chocolate intake and hopefully I get rid of the addiction that has resurfaced since February.  I will be on tuna diet starting tomorrow as Pich has suggested tuna and red meat diet.  I haven’t weighed myself but I feel lighter. However, the bulk of my tummy is yet to diminish.

I am so determined to lose weight right now.  Yesterday, I finally had a facial [after four months!  It should be bi-monthly to take off excess dirt on your face that can't be removed by facial wash].  Upon seeing me, the face specialist asked if I was pregnant -it’s ok if friends kid (no pun) about it, but if a stranger actually calls out my bulging belly and assume that I’m preggers… then that’s totally crushing!

3.      Gym-                I was at Red Corner everyday since May 20.    Saturday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday.  I only missed the two Sundays.  That means I worked out for 6 days straight.  I hope to do it again this week.  Last Wednesday, I worked out for 3 hours nonstop.  My trainer Kim has really improved my agility and punches.  He’s slowly trying to correct my jabs as well.  My combinations are so much faster now and with different variations.  The past three days though, I’ve been training under Redgie, the Kamao finalist who got 1^st runner-up.  He’s like a drill sergeant!!! He never makes me stop and pushes me to exceed limit (which I really appreciate because he’s not only training me with boxing, but he’s also helping me become more fit.  He said he’ll make me lose 15 lbs in a month’s time) I’ll cross my wrapped fingers and hope for the best.

4.      Detox

a.       I haven’t gone out pretty much for the past three weeks.  I’ve only been to the URCC event, Alvin’s party at Embassy, Da Vinci movie date with mb, theo and chris, 3 dinners including a birthday dinner, and the BMW exclusive screening of X-Men III.

b.      I haven’t taken any alcoholic drinks.

c.       1 poker night at a former prof’s condo (and only after Paolo’s persistent persuasion to relax my mind through poker)

d.      Hmm… spending. Contrary to my spending habits 3 weeks prior -I’d say I have cut down 70%.  Last year, I’d think twice on spending 40 bucks on fries -I was that careful with my savings. So, I still have a lot to work on. 

e.       I only put make-up twice a week or if there’s an occasion.

Random Thought #1-                Detoxify!

Random Thought #2-          Nicolas Cage, Ethan Zohn, Hugh Jackman, Jay Hernandez, Clive Owen, Jeff Gordon, Allen Iverson, Usher Raymond, Michael Jordan, and Jack Nicholson are the men totally worthy to look at spend a date with.  Hugh Jackman is celebrating his 10^th year wedding anniversary soon… his wife is 45 while Hugh is 37.  I’d offer to be his partner in life if he wasn’t married [haha]. 

Random Thought #3-          Thank you for all the people who have reprimanded and consoled me during the last two weeks.  I am so blessed to have such a strong and loving support system.  You guys keep me grounded.  Truth + Love + Fun + Solidarity

Shout-outs:

JICA Group:          Thank you for all your prayers and advice.  This group really felt like family to me when I was in Japan.  Since I’m the bunsoy, I would normally turn to my ates and kuyas in the pack for guidance. Special thanks to Ronnie, Rhoda, Randy, Papi Romy, Yvette, Jeng,, Juliet and Sherwin.  I terribly miss you all.

Theo:                      Mayo! Thanks for inviting me and Marc to the Xmen premiere.  All 6 other we brought with us enjoyed the movie as well and the short time spent at Matti.  They extend their thank you/s.

Paolo:                     Fresh from B-Cebu!  Thanks for accompanying me when I visited Rhoda at St. Luke’s and for pounding into my head that I should not do my usual “confrontation.”  I didn’t agree at first until you KEPT on insisting and made me promise that I wouldn’t.  Thank you for the danggit pasalubong!  By the way, did you hear about the poker fiasco at ACF5k tourney?

Norman:                 The Makati gym Cebu native!  Thanks for the dried mangoes and mango-rind (mango and tamarind candy, I loved it!)  Marc up to this day insists that you gave it to him and not to me.  Hence, he dubbed me DMT [Dried Mango Thief] since last week.  I haven’t forgotten your promise you’d bring me more.  I can’t believe those Cebu delicacies have zero fat calories.

Grace:                     [and PIQC group] I can’t wait to see you guys next week!  I also miss you guys!!!  Can’t wait to go videoke with you, Mark, Sean, Brenda and Anne.

Bong:                     Thank you for the sound advice and for comforting me.  We rarely get the chance to chat but when we do, it always turns out to be my silver lining. I’m sorry I missed your gig last Wednesday at Halo.  I still hope you put me in the guest list on the next gig even if I was a no-show last time. Love is love.

Carlo:                      Thank you for being more of yourself in the office than being a hermit.  I’ve totally enjoyed our lunch-outs (no need to treat me all the time! Kulit grabe.), although you can be so techy sometimes, I find myself off course and bewildered.  Haha, remember the “half-a-byte” slip up?  I was so red in the face!

                                Jane:       Maybe the temporary bytes took up some space in your memory card.   

Carlo: Ya, that’s possible.  Blah-blah.  By the way, you know what’s half a byte?

Jane: hmm… a crunch? *snicker snicker”

Carlo: Actually, it does have something to with bite.

Jane: Chew? Grit? Hmm… [After 10 minutes] Ok, I give up.

Carlo: A nibble.

Jane: A nipple???

Carlo: [bursts out laughing]

                                Jane:       What, a nipple?

                                Carlo:      A NIBBLE.

                                Jane:       Oh, a nibble [RED in the face]

C-dub:                    You might have a lot on your mind right now [work and that "matter"], but knowing that you have a good heart and you’re always kind to everyone, things will work out for the best.  “Never borrow from the future.  If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn’t happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice.” -remember that conversation we had about a year ago regarding the health of our moms and my lovelife?  You told me, we worry too much.  It’s hard not to worry, but lighten your load.  We’re here to support you.

There are a few Thank You’s I might be forgetting.  [Just got off the phone with Mayo] By the by, who caught the Chicane Tour at WTC aside from Mayo, C-dub, Kara and Antz?  Too bad I missed it.  Mayo, share your pictures with Chicane!

Writing in my blog has relaxed my otherwise stressful Monday.  Hi-ho, hi-ho, off to the gym I go…

I’m out!

10pm- 2am

My first time at Mugen in Metrowalk, but Chai and the other girls frequent the place for the music.

Thanks for playing the song, Only One.

Chai, that was a nice request, but i got senti!!!

Moment: Girl talk between band breaks. “The Road less traveled.”

Moment: Standing and screaming while the song was playing, mej holding the phone, racq and mej saying hello, meeh looking ridiculously panicked. Chaos. Everyone looking at our group 

Album: http://cushee.multiply.com/photos/album/86/03232006-_Mugen#

When we arrived in Circles, most of the tables were already taken but the place didn’t seem crowded because there was a lot of room to move about. Our first stop was at the Indian line-up. I got beef curry, naan with pecan nuts sauce, tomato-stewed lamb and “beef balls.” I was trying to remember what you call the Indian meatballs. I asked him but he didn’t remember either. I said it starts with an M… Mmm… M-mm… I then asked the lady attendant and she looked at me weirdly and said, “beef balls.” I grinned and said thank you. “Of course, beef balls.” What was I thinking? …Meatballs??? As I turned my back from the smorgasbord of food, I suddenly remembered what it’s called, “Kofta.” Yum. We had a variety of sushis. We also gorged on huge slices of roast beef and veal. I had mine with red wine but leave it up to me not to taste the other sauces. I didn’t try the apple sauce but I tried three other sauces for my roast beef. Red wine sauce with mushroom, Dijon mustard (which I enjoyed the tangy taste against the succulent meat!) and a white gingery sauce that I forgot the name. I can’t even figure out what it’s made of. He went back for a second helping of Indian delicacies. We also tried their Chinese cuisine of steamed fish and assorted asado. I’m disappointed we didn’t get to try a lot of the other stuff because we were so full after our third plate.

The restaurant is dubbed “Circles” for the different themed “circular” sections of food (or maybe only because of the circular placemats haha). There’s a sushi/sashimi station with oysters, mussels and crabs; an appetizer table with salads in shot glasses, mini pie-crusts with cream cheese, a cheese plate, and other unidentifiable but very lovely hors d’oeuvres; a pasta and rissotto bar; roast beef and leg of lamb for carnivores; and an Asian station with curries, dimsum, and basmati rice.

We headed to the dessert section and lo and behold, there was a chocolate fountain beaming at me! I love chocolate fondues! It actually took me 5 minutes to finish getting the pineapples and mallows fully covered with chocolate on my plate. Thank goodness the fellow next to me waited patiently… or they would have asked the burly security to get me off that area. He was looking at me funny coz I was smiling from ear to ear while getting my chocolatey pineapple. I looked obsessed I guess. I noticed it wasn’t too funny anymore when he cradled my arm away from the desserts area. He got a variety of desserts, maybe 8 different kinds that we shared. The dessert cakes tasted as good as the ones in Bizu but he especially liked the creamy pudding. We debated on what kind of dessert was on a mini- champagne glass. I said it was a chocolate soufflé but he was quick to disagree saying that a soufflé has a pouf. I said, “…a what?” laughing. He said, “like a puff… like a puffed pastry of  Janey: Aah… soufflés don’t necessarily have to have a pouf to be called sort.”  a soufflé. I think a soufflé has custard-ly consistency to be called one” Ok for everyone’s sake, I looked it over and here’s the technical definition of a soufflé: A souffle is a dish, either sweet or savory that is made from a flavored base, then lightened with egg whites and baked in a round, straight-sided earthenware dish. It bakes very high and then falls quickly, so it is served straight from the oven. The outer crust is crisp and the interior is soft. It’s a classical dish with many flavors! –so, I think he was more right than me although I got the custard part with the egg whites and baking directions.

Basically, the presentation of the food was appetizing, and there was not one item that I tasted that wasn’t delicious. However, there were about three line-ups that I wasn’t able to go to so I can’t give a full assessment. The buffet price was far from my first guess. It was cheaper than Paseo Uno buffet which cost 1.2 K per head excluding taxes. I’d say that the price was just ideal for everything the place has to offer. The interior was lovely, low-lighted but good enough to appreciate what you’re eating. The place had an exclusivity air to it. It was also roomier than Paseo Uno. I enjoyed their interior pieces as well as the table articles. My final verdict: I wanted to go back the next evening to eat there again. Everything was so gastronomically satisfying!

Call +63 2 840 0884 for reservations.

This was my first experience to shoot as an apprentice for a PR shoot.  I think the proper photographer term for that is VA or volunteer assistant.   Archimedes (no he is not the one who shouted Eureka! Eureka!), or Archie for short (and no, he is not the cartoon character that has a number sign on his forehead), is my blockmate in DLSU who also is a Political Science graduate.  He invited me to join him as he had to shoot Christian Bautista for a Music Academy Press Release.

Archie and I met at Shangri-la Plaza Mall where Music Academy is.  Music Academy is a small music school/studio where Christian Bautista enrolled once before.  I learned a few from arch’s tutorial, lighting set-up, and being a stylist con director.  It was tiring but I had a lot of fun.  (I learmed a few weeks later that my photos were used in a Magazine! Yay!)

Thanks Archie for hooking me up.  I envy your huge backpack and your equip!  I still have your sentimental paper bag! Tee-hee. 

Album: http://cushee.multiply.com/photos/album/102/Christian_BautistaMusic_Acad_Shoot

Like A Dream

By Peddler of Dreams

I hate what I’m feeling

I opened my eyes

I see blue, it must be the sky

I see the tips of my hair

I can feel the wind playing in my ears

A heavy feeling in my stomach

Gravity is pulling me down

Velocity is increasing

I reached out and felt nothing

I realized I’m falling